I am awoken one night with the sounds of domestic doom coming from my next door neighbours house.
It seems all is not at one.
Having recovered from my shock awakening, I start to listen.
Whats more, I start to enjoy- its like a scene from Eastenders, but better.
After all , in the morning I get to look them in the eye and lord my superiority over them.
I now no the ins and outs of all their dirty history!
Anyway, the lording about didn’t last long, as she was gone by morning.
Kid, washing machine and fuck off wide screen tv in toe ( The tv, now that must have really griped him)!
The dust settled, well if you call 48 hours later moving your ex(of 48 hrs)partners best friend in, settled.
Now, call me shallow, call me whatever the fuck you want. None of this bothered me.
What gets right on my tits is, the new perky blond woman he has in there, walks round like she has a giant stick up her arse.
I say ‘hello’ to her, and she sticks her nose in the air and blanks me, yet a man offers her the hand of friendship and she all tits and arse friendly!
I couldn’t give a bollox about her affair ( wrong- you just don’t ride your best friends disco stick), but its brian stunned slappers like her, that give us Brit girls a bad name.
Shame on you- use your brain not your tits!